So tomorrow we celebrate Camden's seventh birthday. As exciting of a day it is, and I am so excited about it, I can't help but have the feeling of sadness knowing that he will want his daddy to be there with him as well. I wish that I could give him his daddy back, I wish I could heal his pain.
Nine months have past, and I still find it hard to believe that this has happened, I find it hard to understand how such a tragic event could have taken place in my families life, my son's life. This is not fair. Seven years ago, this is not the life that Justin and I had planned for Cam. I feel like he was cheated, he was dealt a bad hand, I don't get it. I understand that he is not the first child to loose a parent and certainly(unfortunately) will not be the last, but he's my son, and for seven years I've have spent my life doing everything to protect him from everything, I just never imagined that it would be something so tragic that would bring me to the understanding that I cannot protect him from everything.
I hope that he feels his fathers presence tomorrow, I hope that he hears his voice in his head saying I love you, I hope that he knows his daddy is there to celebrate with him, and knows how proud his daddy is of him.
Justin, we all miss you so much, and think of you every day, we love you!
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